Why do you say things like that?

So yeah, I'm kind of depressed today. Last night some people said something about me that really hurt. They didn't say it to my face of course, cause that's rude. No they said it to someone else. Mostly as a general comment.

These people don't know me. They don't know who I am. They don't know my personality or how I deal with things in any kind of relationship. I try to be unbiased when talking to these people because I don't know them well either. Sure, I am guilty of making comments about them, but not when other people can hear me. I know it won't get back to them.

I don't like making people feel poorly about themselves. I have struggled with self-esteem issues for as long as I can remember. I still don't have the highest self-esteem, but I have to say it has gotten better.

This incident has hit me hard. I had a difficult time falling asleep last night because I kept thinking to myself, "Am I really like that?" I don't want to be "one of those people" so it's really bothering me that they said that.

I don't know if "they" is one person or more than one, but it doesn't really matter. The thing is, you would think that they would be smart enough not to make a comment about me when there is a possibility that it can get back to me. What kind of person does that? Not someone that I want to associate with, honestly.

I tend to stay away from people who are destructive towards me. Insults are destructive. I'm debating on what to do. I know I won't be able to single out this person, because I will have no way of finding out who actually said it. I am not going to make this into a big issue, because, again, I will be "that guy."

All I ask for is a little respect. Is that so wrong? I think that I go out of my way sometimes to show respect to other people. There are instances where I cannot control the situation. What am I to do then? *shrug* I have no idea.

I know I have a habit of over-reacting, though I have been working on that. Really I have. Change comes with time, it is not always instantaneous. I am an emotional person. I am trying to deal with this by myself because if I say anything, I'll just be over-reacting ... Whatever.

Ok, see? Now I am starting to get bitter. Not good. Ok, back to the point at hand.

Am I going overboard? I don't think so. But no one tells me otherwise. Sigh. I guess we will see what happens.